I promise, after this, I swear I'll be done with these birthday posts and move on to something else.
We had a birthday party for Reed and we combo'd it with our friend Mardi and Ryan and their little girl Brinnley. Brinn was born just 4 days after Reed, her birthday was actually Sunday. So we did one big party for the two of them on Saturday. The plan was to have it at the park near my house, but at the last minute (ok the last 45 minutes) it started raining and the temp dropped a ton so it was going to be pretty uncomfortable outside. Though it would have been more spacious, people would have been miserable! So we changed it over to our house with only a half hour to spare. I think we pulled off the quick changeover and to my knowledge, we didn't lose anyone in the move! Here are the birthday kiddo's: We got everything set up and ready to roll by the time the first people arrived. We were able to have a nice play area in the living room for all the little kiddos. We also had lots of yummy food. Here are the massive amount of cupcakes we had:
And custom double-decker 4" cakes made by Fran. They didn't have a lot of surface area for the names, but they were cute anyway! Brinn was less than thrilled about the whole thing. She was tired anyway (as you can see by the picture above of the two of them) then we stuck this hat on her head, lit a candle in front of her, and had a ton of people staring at her singing. She cried, the poor thing! She didn't eat any of the cake, but her mom and dad did ;)... Here is Reed sharing his with me (as I'm the one with the camera). He didn't face plant it like he did on Wednesday, but he was enjoying it anyway! Here are the daddy's with their birthday kids! Then it was on to presents. Many of our guests had left at that point (which was fine, it calmed down a bit). Brinn had finished and was enjoying the best part of her gifts - the paper. Reed was just holding the gift over his head (maybe like Johnny Carsen used to?). And that was about it. We cleaned up and just chilled the rest of the weekend! Thanks to everyone that was able to attend! Now we forge on to the second year of Reed's life, whatever we have in store...
Reed's birthday was a great success on Wednesday. The day started with his 12 month well check with Doctor Tony! Stats for his 12 months is in the post below. Here he is waiting for his check up: Then we ran a few errands and met up with Fogg for lunch. Then it was home for a nice long nap so he could be rested up for the evening activities. We had Grandma and Papa (Fogg) here, my mom, Nana and Papa Branch, and Sean over for dinner and festivities. After pizza dinner, we opened gifts and had cake. Reed wasn't very good at opening gifts. He was excited to see them and touch them, but after the first gift, he didn't want to stop playing with it to move on to the next one. I had to help him open the next ones. As you can see, he really enjoyed the hammer... Then it was on to cake. He didn't quite know what to do with it, just grabbing little bites to begin with. He finally came up with this solution: We had a great day celebrating Reed's one year mark! We made it alive this long, I think we might be ok parents so far.
This post is going to be part one of Reed's first birthday (apparently this occasion requires multiple posts by me) and some beautiful family pictures!
So yesterday was Reed's first birthday. And unless you are completely new to my blog or living under a rock - you knew that. Yes, I had an emotional evening prior to the big day. Yes, I slept like crap that night. Yes, I had an emotional morning on his birthday. But then I sorted out whatever emotions I was having and really enjoyed the rest of the day! I hope to give you another post this evening, including pictures of his birthday celebration! But now, I give you his one year baby stats and developments:
He weighs 21 pounds 7.5 ounces
He is 29 inches tall
He is in the 50th percentile for almost everything size-wise.
He is on track with all developmental milestones, except that he has yet to say a word. The doc assures me that this is no biggy right now, he's a boy that is more interested in playing that learning to talk. He does "talk" a lot, using similar inflection in his fake words, yet no specific words said to a specific person (we hear a lot of mamama, dadada, papapa, bababa but to nothing in particular). Though he may say "hi" we aren't really sure.
He is stacking things (see previous post with picture) which doc says is pretty cool and advanced.
He has a heart murmur. We didn't know this before - it's a benign thing, called Stills.
We got some family pics taken by Chad Kirkland last weekend (over Mother's Day weekend). Side note: to all of my wonderfully talented photog friends and family - I'm sorry I could not get pictures taken by all of you. You are great people and take unbelievably beautiful pictures; I could either not afford your services or you are too far away. I still love every one of you. Ok, back to the pictures. Chad did a great job, a young kid just getting started in the biz. Here are just some of my favorites! Also notice one of the pictures as the new Fogg Blogg pic. Enjoy!
Literally, a year ago, I was in the hospital, really starting to feel my contractions. Now, I have this amazing little boy that I never thought I could feel so much love for. I'm very sure that this evening and tomorrow mean nothing to Reed (it's just another day to him!) but for me, it's really bringing back memories of how quickly the year has gone, how much in my life has changed, how much I have changed. In some ways it's been a fast year, in others a very slow year. But nonetheless, it's been an entire year! I'm fairly overcome with emotion when I think of giving birth to Reed, thinking about the year, and knowing it's his first birthday tomorrow! I'm actually surprised how emotional I am getting about the whole thing.
In some ways I miss the tiny (ok well, as tiny as Reed ever was at 9 pounds) little newborn who couldn't keep his own head up, spit up pretty much all the time, slept all the time and hated tummy time. But mostly, I'm so excited to watch Reed learn new things all the time, discover the world around him and take all those big new steps in life. I can't wait till he is really walking on his own. And when he says his first word. Mostly because I wish only success and happiness for my child and though walking may make my life a bit more chaotic, it's worth it to watch my child progress. It's crazy how much joy a parent gets from watching their child grow and learn. I never understood it before children.
So as I go to sleep tonight (something I didn't do last year on May 18th!) I will think long and hard I'm sure about my little baby boy, whose first year went WAY too quickly and that I don't think I could love any more than I already do. I'm sure there will be way more pictures and posts in the next week as we have his actual birthday tomorrow with a small group of family and lots of gifts I'm sure, a party on Saturday and other goodness. Before I go tonight, I will share with you some of his newest talents:
He loves the bath! Here he is throwing out his rubber ducky and screaming in delight.
Maybe going to be a plumber?
After his adventure under the sink, he disappeared and I found him playing by himself in his room. He was talking to himself and throwing things.
And this might just be my favorite new thing he's doing - stacking. If he can find a way to balance one object on another, he'll do it. He was playing in the pantry then took off. A few minutes later, I walk in the pantry to get something and this is what I found. Hysterical!
My first Mother's day was great! Though Reed didn't do much (he had no idea obviously that it was mother's day), Fogg did a nice job of making it sweet for me. It really started on Friday, when Fogg explained that his planned gift didn't work out so well. He was going to make a plaster cast of Reed's hand but it got a little screwed up when he tried it (I suppose you have to do it like 5 times before it's a good result). So we were going to do it again as a family! Fun! But unfortunately, we screwed it up again! Oh well.
Saturday, we went and got some family pictures taken. Fogg isn't exactly photogenic, but he was a trooper and didn't complain too much ;) I'm so excited to see how they turned out! Then we went to Costco and picked up some beautiful flowers! I love having flowers in the house - they just make you feel happier! We went and had a nice dinner at a place we've never been to in Bountiful - boy there are a lot of kids in Bountiful! Anyway, it was pretty yummy, especially the baked cookie dessert thing!
Unfortunately, that night, Fogg got called out for Search and Rescue and didn't make it to bed until 2am! So on Sunday morning, I hung out with my little guy until Fogg got up. We headed off to church where we met up with our good friend Sean Hall. Sean was able to hang out with us the rest of the day! We headed back home so Reed could nap before lunch at Taggart's. Luckily, we called ahead for a reservation, cause I heard there was an hour and a half wait - at 1pm! After a yummy lunch, and a cookie to go, we headed home for a bike ride. Here are some pictures of that:I'm glad that Fogg pulls this thing - I'm not sure I could do it, plus it makes it harder for him so maybe I have a chance of keeping up...
I'm not sure why he likes to eat his sock, but he does!
Here is Fogg and Sean
More sock eating...
After the bike ride, we headed to our neighbors house for some libations and good conversation. We had a good time laughing and telling stories. And Sean ate lots more food (not sure where he puts it cause I was still full from lunch and his skinny little body fit a whole other meal in there!) Reed played in the little house that the neighbor girl, Kya, has. He was really enjoying it. The rest of the evening was back to "normal", putting Reed to bed, cleaning up for the day, getting ready for another week. We were able to complete our hand plaster project on Tuesday, here is the almost final result. We still need to put it in the frame/box with a picture from our outing. I'm so excited to see the final product, what a unique and special Mother's Day gift! Lots of stuff going on in the next few weeks! It's our 6th anniversary this Saturday, then Fogg's parents join us to celebrate Reed's birthday on Wednesday! We are having a birthday party next Saturday, then Fogg's brother and family come in that week! I'm so excited for all the visitors and fun we are going to have. It's going to be so fun to see our niece and show around Dale and Georgette to our new home. We also have lots planned while they are here - it'll be so fun to bring the kids to stuff and to let them hang out. Gabby sure does love Reed so I can't wait for them to interact. Last time she saw him, he was like 3 months old and didn't do much. Hopefully he learns to walk in the next few weeks so that they can really have fun playing together. So excited!!!
As my first Mother’s Day approaches, I have spent a little time (on my drive, see previous post about my drive) thinking about my first year as a mother.I gave birth just after mother’s day last year, so I get to really commemorate my mother’s day s in full years.It’s still weird to be called a “mom” but I’m getting more used to it, as I’m dying for Reed to say ‘mama’ before he says anything else.I’ve also very much embraced becoming a parent and when you do that, you become a mom.
I’ve been thinking if I’ve been a good mom so far or not.Do the choices I make help my son grow and learn?Have I made decisions that might harm his physical health?Am I mentoring him enough by example to teach him to be a good person?Am I too protective, not protective enough?Am I the kind of mom that my son looks back on as the most amazing person in his life?
If you look at things practically, then I guess I’m doing ok.He’s still alive – score one for me.He’s pretty happy and healthy – two for me.He’s clean, well-fed, cared-for and sheltered – three for me.But let’s go beyond that.I’ve been thinking a lot about the fact that I work full time and spend almost every day, all day long away from him and have to depend on very, very generous people in my life to care for him.
For all practical purposes, I have to work.I must earn the income to support the lifestyle that we chose.Do I want to work?Well, no, not really.If I didn’t have the restraint of finances, I’d probably stay at home.But at the same time, thinking about being home all day every day (and by home, I mean the sole caregiver for my child) makes me crazy!I need to challenge my mind, interact with other adults, do something to feel a purpose.Is what I do so important that it makes the world go round? No, but what I do is interesting, challenging and people seem to appreciate me.But most days, I spend much of my day wondering what Reed is doing.Is he napping, eating, playing?Is he happy, doing something new, learning something?
Several months ago, Reed was on the cusp of crawling as I have my coat on, bag over my shoulder, car keys in hand to go to work.I would have died if he crawled for the first time while I was at work.So I stuck around to watch it happen and was ½ hour late to work.Absolutely worth it!But how many other firsts am I going to miss while at work?I don’t get to know every nuance of Reed’s day or behavior.I don’t get to observe when something just clicks for him.What if I miss the first real steps?Or first word?I’m so busy that I didn’t get do things that I wanted to like take a picture of him every week next to the same stuffed animal.For this, I feel like a failure.I feel like I’m not always there for him when he might want me.I’m certainly not the only “woman” in his life he can completely trust.I’m not the one that taught him everything he knows.
On the other hand, when I work, Reed learns valuable things that I can never teach him.Like how to trust that I’ll ALWAYS come back.And that there are other fabulous, loving people in his life that would do anything for him (thanks so much Nana and Lala!).And how to relax and nap in an unfamiliar place. And to play with other kids sometimes (thanks Bree and Jill!).And to be with a stranger sometimes is ok.And to be with other dogs. I’d say that he is a well adjusted child because of this.
People told me that after the first few months back to work, I wouldn’t be so sad to be away from my kiddo, that it got better.I’m apparently not like these people because it has not gotten better.I’m still sad to walk out the door in the morning and drive away from my little buddy.I’m still so glad to walk in the door at the end of the day to see him.I still wish all day long that I could give him a kiss or watch him sleep.I’ve been back at work for 9 months now and I still feel like I did that first day.
Being a mom is hard work.A kind of hard work that can’t be described or empathized with.It’s that you are always a mother.Every moment of every day, you are a mom.When you are away from them, you are still a mom that worries and wonders and loves and wishes.You must provide everything from making them clean, to a bed to lay their big heads.And food to put in their mouths and a shoulder to rest on.The burden of a mother doesn’t ever go away. And I appreciate my mom a whole lot more for being a mom.
So the debate goes on, every single day in my head – Work v Mom.Do I have to choose?Can I be both?I wish nothing more than the best for my child, as every parent feels.Is working actually making me a better parent because I’m not frustrated, or worse because I spoil him when I am there?Until I have a choice, I suppose I’ll have to learn to be ok with being a working mom.
I can’t be perfect at being a parent, I don’t believe there is such a thing.But I hope that I allow him to explore and learn things on his own, but still make sure he is safe.I hope that I give discipline when it’s needed and love when it’s wanted.And teach him to be a good, respectful, caring, giving, thoughtful and intelligent adult.But at least I get 17 more years to figure that out…
Here is Reed sharing his with me (as I'm the one with the camera). He didn't face plant it like he did on Wednesday, but he was enjoying it anyway!
And that was about it. We cleaned up and just chilled the rest of the weekend! Thanks to everyone that was able to attend! Now we forge on to the second year of Reed's life, whatever we have in store...
